Life Leasons from the Lost Coin/rebate card

The Bible has a couple stories of people searching for the lost. There is the story of the shepherd leaving the other 99 sheep to look for the one lost. Then there is the story of the woman looking for the one lost coin in her house. This morning I kept thinking of that woman as I tore my house up looking for a lost rebate card that had arrived in the mail on Monday. Word to the wise, when you are a mother with 3 young children do not leave anything undone and never leave anything important on the table. I delayed putting away the card when it arrived and for 2 days I had been thinking (Holy Spirit promptings perhaps?) that I needed to relocate the card. Today I tried to do just that only to discover it missing.

Last night we had been watching “18 Kids and Counting” and Mr. Duggar was talking about the importance of guarding our reactions to things and that kids will watch carefully your reactions and follow that much more then what you say. All while I was looking this morning through my messy house while trying to cook breakfast and with kids practically hanging on me the whole time I felt my temperature rising. I just needed a moment to think about where that card could be and I wasn’t getting it. On top of that I was failing the test. I kept striving for right reactions and not blowing it out of proportion but tempting things kept coming.

We are trying to transition from using credit constantly to using cash only. This is our first month and so whatever money we have has to get us through. It will be close until I get paid again. Our food is coming primarily from the pantry (thank goodness I stocked that up this summer). We are avoiding unnecessary driving and attempting to lay low financially for awhile. In this environment  I loose a sizeable rebate card.

I kept thinking we can adjust somewhere else, it’s not worth it to loose my temper with the kids and the Lord will provide but my reactions were not reflecting peace. Finally I called the company to see if there was any chance I could get another. I didn’t have my hopes up. But low and behold customer service is not dead, it was no big deal and I will receive another card in as little as a week. So all that stress was virtually pointless. I have been loosing stuff a lot lately. My phone a fews weeks ago, my wallet the week after that and now this. Maybe there is a lesson I am supposed to learn? Hopefully I will be done loosing stuff for awhile, but I know I didn’t ace the test today.

The Writing Life

Until college I never considered myself a writer. In fact it wasn’t until about 2 years on the job as a freelance writer for a local ethnic paper that I really considered myself a writer. I have had some poems published and have some notariety in this area. At one point my dream life was moving to a foreign country, living there for several years, then writing a travel guide about the area and using that to fund the next move and couple of years. I saw myself working in publishing and being a great writer. I was working at a bookstore at the time and dreaming of having a book on the New York Times best seller list. This was before having children.

Shortly before I found out I was pregnant with my first child, my husband and I decided I would quit my full time job and try to make a go of the writing thing. Not to write travel novels and guides but magazine articles with a focus on food. Within the month I was pregnant. I still held on to this dream, until my 2nd child. Then I realized it was probably going to be really difficult to write anything significant with 2 little children.

Then my 3rd child came along and my dream changed. Instead of the writing life I wanted to devote my time to mothering my 3 blessings and pray that more would come. Oddly enough for 7 years–since my senior year in college–I had been writing for a local paper. At first it was just 2 or 3 articles every couple weeks and since I had to come up with my own stories I didn’t think that I would ever be able to increase to make it a steady income. But while my dream was changing God was fulfilling all my dreams. Now I can say I am a full time mom and part time writer and make a good part time income while working out of the house. If I do have a story I have to go to it is normally for a short period of time and I can arrange it around my husband’s, mother or mother-in-law’s schedule. I even bring the children with my on occasion.

Avril is my own little writer. She has an intense interest in letters and writing. When she was a little over 2 years old she would ask me for a little, “journal” and pen and would write. She understood how you would start at the left and go to the right and would right on lines.

Now I am working on my own blog, though I still have to work on consistency I am having a blast.

Better Late Than Early

The past couple of days I had really been stressing about educating the kids. I knew that second guessing yourself and not feeling qualified to educate your child are feelings common among homeschool moms. I didn’t think I would have a problem with that. I feel qualified to teach literature, and Algebra. Imagine my surprise when I began doubting my ability to teach my young children. Yes I was scared of Early Childhood Education.

I knew that the TV and computer were draining many hours away from my children. I knew I had contributed to the problem by not monitoring it while I was busy with other things. Yesterday I put a major effort into coming up with things to do with them only to be frustrated by continual requests for TV and computer. I went to my parents and poured out my heart. My mom said, “you can’t get so frustrated just because they ask. Just be firm,     provide consequences and realize it is a process.”

So I thought about that. I had been ready to go buy all these curriculums and schedule the days of my 5 and 3 year olds. Truth be told I would just love for them to play and entertain themselves–to be free and unstructured for awhile. The problem is I am a structured person and I wasn’t sure how to get them playing.

I turned to the Adventist Home Educator manual for ideas and this quote from Ellen White once again inspired me, “For the first eight or ten years of a child’s life the field or garden is the best schoolroom, the mother the best teacher, nature the best lesson book. . .He should be surrounded with the conditions most favorable to both physical and mental growth.” Education page 208. The Manual also quotes liberally the Moores who advocated when it came to schooling it is, “Better Late Than Early.”

So I was reminded once again that homeschool is not about curriculum and textbooks, it is about real activities and experiences. Cooking and cleaning, reading together, going for walks, even the occasional movie but its about living life together. I have plenty of ideas about how to amp up the learning, more reading throughout the day, art projects, cooking and cleaning together on a daily basis, having morning and evening worships, walking the dog and taking care of the chickens and other animals. Winter is still a problem, but I am encouraged, now I just need to put it into practice. More to come on our progress.

Long Winter Evenings

The last month has been really intense for us all. Financially we have been going through alot of changes, but it is the seasonal changes that have really thrown us for a loop. Saturday daylight savings time ended. Now we face nearly 4 hours of darkness before bedtime. The weather has been colder and it has been much less comfortable to spend time out of doors, though we certainly have plenty to do. Through frequent visits to the cousins’ houses Two has developed a fondness for computer games that has grown to a near obsession.

So we are facing long, cold days indoors with both the TV and computer to tempt the attentions of my son. Also I am nearly exhausted from the previous month which comes at the end of a very intense year. Through it all I am struggling to keep the family on a path to betterment. While there are certainly some valuable shows on TV and some good games I am trying to impress upon the children the need for balance. Once last fall I was talking Mavis to the chiropractor. They had free cookies in the lobby. Two had one before the appointment, one on the way back to the room and one on the way home. He told me about half way through the 3rd one, “you shouldn’t have let me have so many cookies, my tummy hurts.” I try to explain that TV and computers are like cookies, too much makes you sick, but it is harder for them to feel the effects.

Luckily Two has now transitioned to an interest in chapter books, so I am actually enjoying the stories as well. Last night we went to bed and read for an hour before bed. Normally that time would be spent watching TV.

So I keep striving to maximize not only my time but alos that of the children. To bring our family together, through time well spent and meaningful interactions. These long winter evenings can be used for good or ill. So far it is no looking good but I am hoping to make a difference.

Nostalgia

I was up north this weekend, most likely for the last time this year. Here is a poem inspired by my trip.

Nostalgia

The cry of beauty is too often silenced
    in homes with more TVs 
    then children.
Crying grates on us.
We prefer broadcast news.

Here is a newsflash–
Babies were not made to cry.
    “What’s that?” you say.
    “How can that be?” 
    you miss the point.

You missed the yellow-gold 
    aspen leaves fluttering against a 
        blue sky.
You missed the bees completely,
    and were happy you did.

You missed beauty’s cry for attention.
Rain simply justifies staying indoors.

I think this place is a poem
you don’t get
and I miss

Homemade Christmas

I don’t know exactly where I developed my love for handmade items. My mother made the majority of my sister’s and my clothes. That was probably a start. Then later I worked at Historic Fort Snelling as a “costumed interpreter.” My job was to dress in clothes from 1827 and live as though that were the year while tourists visited with us. Some of our clothes were provided but things like cold weather gear were not. I learned to knit just so I could make my own mittens and keep my hands warm.

That year I learned to knit I made scarves for all my cousins for Christmas. I was hooked. Now each year as Christmas approaches I get very excited. I try to figure out what those on my list might like and what I have time to produce. This year those on my list can expect knitted items, sewed items, homemade beauty products and cheese.
 
It really helps get in the mood for Christmas when you start now.

Here is a recipe I made for myself for an early Christmas present from Natural Beauty at Home by Janice Cox.

Basic Cold Cream

1/8 tsp Borax powder
1/4 cup distilled water
1/2 olive oil
2 Tbsp grated beeswax

Dissolve the borax in the water in a glass measuring cup and set aside.

Mix together the oil and beeswax in another glass measuring cup. Place the glass cup in a pan water (about 1 to 2 inches of water), making a water bath. Heat the oil-besswax mixture in the water bath over medium heat until the beeswax is melted (8-10 minutes), stirring occasionally.

When the wax is melted, bring the borax-water mixture almost to boiling –I do this by putting the glass cup in the microwave on High for 1 minute. You may also use a water bath. Remove the oil-beeswax mixture from the water bath. Slowly add the borax-water misture to it, stirring briskly.

Pour the cream into a clean container with a lid. To use massage a small amount into your skin and tissue off or rinse off with warm water.

I used it last night. Proeun even used it and it worked great.

Yer’s Garden

This Monday I had an opportunity to visit another farm. I was doing double duty as a writer covering the event and a farmer hoping to learn from it. Yer Vang is a Hmong immigrant from Laos. She has been farming 7 acres in Dakota county for over 4 years. This year she is taking part in a “cabbage project” a study about alternative methods of pest control on cabbage. This is why she was hosting an open house.

For me though the highlight of the day was the food. Served under  simple canopy on the edge of the woods surrounding her field the simple fare tasted like a feast. Vang had set up a little shack for the occasional over night gardening and to provide shelter during the day. She and her sisters arrived early the morning we were all set to arrive. They harvested and prepared it the same day over an open fire at the edge of the field. There was steamed squash and green beans, Stir-fried mustard greens, Hot chile sauce, sliced cucumber and my children’s favorite, sliced watermelon.

After a grace said in the language I didn’t understand we all dug in. The atmosphere was perfect. The kids were dirty from playing in the woods before the meal but no one really cared.

Afterwards I decided to purchase a watermelon. I am not sure what variety it was nice something was lost in translation but it was fabulous. I asked if I could save the seeds and she said yes, so next year I will grow watermelon I do not know the name of. Obviously good, fresh food spans many cultures.

Cooking Falls Bounty

Now that harvesting is winding down and days are cooler I am really enjoying cooking up fall’s bounty. During the busy harvesting season we ended up eating out way too much. Mostly because after a busy day harvesting and canning and with a kitchen still a mess the last thing I wan’t to do was make some big complicated meal. But now I finally had to call it quits canning. There is only so much you can do and at least if we run out there is always a store to tide us over till next year. I had to laugh that we were canning to save ourselves money and eat healthier then we were eating out a couple times a week.

Now I am trying my best to reclaim my role in the kitchen and at the table. With all of us coming down with something I realize it is even more important to eat healthy, wholesome food.

This morning I made “Three Sisters Stew.” It was originally named for the squash, beans and corn in the dish that was traditionally grown in a configuration known as “three sisters.” We had to rename it however since it caused some confusion with Avril who thought we were eating, “two girls.”

Anyway it is a great traditional dish. And I told Proeun this batch was particularly special because other then the spices and onions we grew everything in the dish–squash, beans, corn and tomatoes. Here’s the recipe.

Three Sisters Stew

1 cup dried beans
3 cups water
2 cloves garlic

2 tsp dried oregano
1 tsp cumin
1/2 tsp cinnamon
1 Tbsp olive oil
1 medium onion
1 1/2 tsp salt
2-3 cloves garlic
2-3 cups winter squash cut in chunks
14 oz or 1 pint canned tomatoes
1 Tbsp chile powder
1 1/2 cups fresh or frozen corn.

Cook the beans, I like to put them in a crock pot on high for 6-8 hours.

In large pot quickly dry roast oregano and cumin and cinnamon for about 30 seconds. Add oil, onion, salt and garlic; saute until onions are soft. Add squash, tomatoes and chile powder and cook about 20 minutes until squash is soft. Add some water if mixture seems dry. Add cooked beans and corn, simmer until corn is tender.

From Mothering magazine, Sept/oct. 2006

Fall Cleaning

Mentally I am just about done with tomatoes. i can’t imagine living in a part of the country that doesn’t have seasons. They just seem like such a welcome change to all that it happening. Almost from the beginning of the summer I was ready for winter and here it comes. Harvests are winding down and while I could always do some more canning I am done with that too.

I am on to planning for homeschool, knitting, reading, journaling and quiet evenings at home finishing up our garden out back and cleaning the house for winter. Cleaning out all the dust and grime that have been tracked in and blown in through the windows. Fall has always been my favorite time of year,. This year is no different.

To help with my cleaning I bought a bunch of Norwex cloths at a product party my aunt had. I loved them so much I decided to have a party. They seem to fit right into the lifestyle Proeun and I are working to build. The cloths have a really tight weave and actually have silver woven through them which makes them antibacterial. I bought some for my kitchen and love clean counters and tables. I bought some travel size for my purse and a multi colored baby pack. None of the products have any chemicals in them and you can actually use them to clean chemical free. I had been using Melaleuca for years but this is really easy. Moms are so funny when our new toys are cleaning supplies.

In Need of Balance

When I was younger I took gymnastics. It didn’t come easily for me and I soon lost interest. The balance beam was particularly hard for me. Now as a mother of 3 little ones I find balancing hasn’t gotten any easier. I have these grand ideas of the life I would like our family to live. A simple life is at the top of my list. But simple isn’t turning out to be that simple.

This year we began a new adventure as a family–farming. It has taken much more time then we originally had anticipated. But it has also been more rewarding. I remember the time when I was writing but couldn’t bring myself to say, “I am a writer.” This summer we made the transition from farming to farmers. Even though the change is mostly in our head it is significant. The change coincided roughly with the harvest time. When we went from growing food to producing food.

It has been such a busy time. We are trying to figure out how to estimate how much our field will produce and how much we have time to harvest. It has been a continual balancing act trying to push limits of our field, markets and ability. Added to that I have been trying to process our extra tomatoes and put a little something extra by for winter. Plus I have continued my other part time job as writer. The season is short and soon tomatoes will be done as well as our money making opportunity (little that it is).

If it sounds like I have too much on my plate you would be right. Yes we spend the day together farming and taking care of the house, but I have definitely not been the mother I want to be. This year Two turned 5; this means Kindergarten. We are planning to homeschool but so far our lessons remain agriculturally focused. Next week we are going to try out a 4H club.

But every day I find it harder and harder to keep my focus. I get worn down by all the business, wondering what could possibly be cut out and then cut it out only to find the next day I need more balance. So far I have found the only thing I cannot afford to sacrifice is the children, while I know that logically I realize they have borne the brunt of my frustrations. When it gets to the end of the day and I accomplished a lot but the children watched TV all day what did I really accomplish? I have decided I ( and the children) need frequent recentering days. This is one of them. Striving for a simple life is not easy.